My Biggest Fear

In today's reading from 1 Samuel 15:24-35 I am haunted by one of my worst fears.

Verse 34 says that "The Lord was sorry that he had ever made Saul king over Israel."

One of my biggest fears is that as I go through the process of starting a new church I would do something to bring disgrace to God or His name.

We are all sinners, we all make mistakes - but I hope and pray that I would never become hardened to the point where I callously make choices in my life that cause people to turn away from God.

With great power comes great responsibility. I think that is the case that Saul found himself in. As he continued to make choices that led Israel to fall away from God. But is Saul any different than the rest of us? Is being a pastor of a church - any different than any other Joe the Plumber?

Yes, there is a higher degree of visibility, but each one of us is called to lead a life of obedience to God. If we fail to obediently follow the Lord's leading in our life, we are sinning. If we consistently sin and cause other people to turn away from the Lord we risk reaching the point where we bring disgrace upon the name of the Lord. When that happens we risk reaching the point where God rejects us. (Don't confuse this with thinking that God stops loving us) Perhaps he loves us (and others) too much to continue sinning and to let us lead others astray.